I still remember the moment like it was yesterday.
I was a junior in high school when the planes hit the Twin Towers on 9/11. The school announced what had happened over the intercom. At lunch, the school rolled out those old CRT TVs on carts, and we all sat in silence watching the news play it on repeat—images of horror, confusion, and sorrow looping endlessly. My brother and I looked at each other, and something inside both of us said: We have to do something. We felt a deep, instinctual pull to serve. To defend.
That event changed everything.
I dove headfirst into researching what really happened. I didn't just stick to mainstream sources—I turned to forums, documentaries, and long-form discussions on IRC (Internet Relay Chat), which I already used for gaming. What started as curiosity became obsession. I encountered perspectives and voices that had been buried, dismissed, or mocked—people who had spent decades trying to speak the truth. Some of it sounded insane at first. But the more I followed the “rabbit holes,” the more the puzzle pieces clicked together. And suddenly, the wild theories didn’t seem so wild anymore. They started making more sense than the official stories ever did.
My brother ended up joining the Navy, and I walked away from that era not only with a skeptical view of politics and media—but with a brain wired for deep research and relentless truth-seeking.
Fast forward a couple decades...
I wasn’t religious. I didn’t care. I had the “do whatever makes you happy” mindset.
But I had unknowingly married a Catholic woman. We had children. But our marriage was falling apart.
She was extremely feminist, emotionally manipulative, and I was becoming a shell of a man—trapped in a toxic marriage, full of resentment, anxiety, and isolation. I was smoking weed constantly, having psychotic episodes, and losing my grip on reality. I felt broken, beaten, and full of rage. I hated her. I told myself: If she’s going to try to break me with her Catholic morality and religious guilt, I’ll tear it all down.
So I made a plan.
I’d learn everything I could about Catholicism so I could dismantle it piece by piece.
But God had other plans.
The deeper I dug, the more I realized I wasn’t disproving anything—I was proving it. The history, the theology, the logic—it all pointed to something true. Unshakably true. Jesus wasn’t just a myth or astrological allegory. Catholicism wasn’t just a system of control. It was the system of truth, beauty, and order.
God used my pride and anger as tools to guide me.
He let me think I was on a mission to destroy something—but I was actually on a mission to rebuild myself.
Over time, I saw it all: the signs, the patterns, the moments of divine timing that were too perfect to be coincidence. God had been pursuing me my whole life—and I only realized it when I was desperate enough to pay attention.
That’s how my journey started—from conspiracy rabbit holes to psychosis to spiritual awakening.
I questioned everything. And in doing so, I found Truth. And with it, I regained my manhood, led my wife back to her maternal nature and nurture my family back to love.
What about you? What moment in your life made you start questioning what you thought you knew?
I was a junior in high school when the planes hit the Twin Towers on 9/11. The school announced what had happened over the intercom. At lunch, the school rolled out those old CRT TVs on carts, and we all sat in silence watching the news play it on repeat—images of horror, confusion, and sorrow looping endlessly. My brother and I looked at each other, and something inside both of us said: We have to do something. We felt a deep, instinctual pull to serve. To defend.
That event changed everything.
I dove headfirst into researching what really happened. I didn't just stick to mainstream sources—I turned to forums, documentaries, and long-form discussions on IRC (Internet Relay Chat), which I already used for gaming. What started as curiosity became obsession. I encountered perspectives and voices that had been buried, dismissed, or mocked—people who had spent decades trying to speak the truth. Some of it sounded insane at first. But the more I followed the “rabbit holes,” the more the puzzle pieces clicked together. And suddenly, the wild theories didn’t seem so wild anymore. They started making more sense than the official stories ever did.
My brother ended up joining the Navy, and I walked away from that era not only with a skeptical view of politics and media—but with a brain wired for deep research and relentless truth-seeking.
Fast forward a couple decades...
I wasn’t religious. I didn’t care. I had the “do whatever makes you happy” mindset.
But I had unknowingly married a Catholic woman. We had children. But our marriage was falling apart.
She was extremely feminist, emotionally manipulative, and I was becoming a shell of a man—trapped in a toxic marriage, full of resentment, anxiety, and isolation. I was smoking weed constantly, having psychotic episodes, and losing my grip on reality. I felt broken, beaten, and full of rage. I hated her. I told myself: If she’s going to try to break me with her Catholic morality and religious guilt, I’ll tear it all down.
So I made a plan.
I’d learn everything I could about Catholicism so I could dismantle it piece by piece.
But God had other plans.
The deeper I dug, the more I realized I wasn’t disproving anything—I was proving it. The history, the theology, the logic—it all pointed to something true. Unshakably true. Jesus wasn’t just a myth or astrological allegory. Catholicism wasn’t just a system of control. It was the system of truth, beauty, and order.
God used my pride and anger as tools to guide me.
He let me think I was on a mission to destroy something—but I was actually on a mission to rebuild myself.
Over time, I saw it all: the signs, the patterns, the moments of divine timing that were too perfect to be coincidence. God had been pursuing me my whole life—and I only realized it when I was desperate enough to pay attention.
That’s how my journey started—from conspiracy rabbit holes to psychosis to spiritual awakening.
I questioned everything. And in doing so, I found Truth. And with it, I regained my manhood, led my wife back to her maternal nature and nurture my family back to love.
What about you? What moment in your life made you start questioning what you thought you knew?